when i open my eyes...

after i sharing a draft of my book 'when i close my eyes...' to my good little mate sarah she told me that next i will have to write a story called 'when i open my eyes...' well, this isn't quite a story sarah i think it might be more of a poem. but thanks for the suggestion. i wrote this remembering what it was like waking up as a little kid. my childhood memories have never been stronger since having children of my own...he he, children. i'm just getting used to the plural! xx

so i guess this grown up photo might not be quite fitting but i just love it. x

when i open my eyes...

i blink at the light and wait for my eyes to catch up with the rest of the world

my throat is dry, 

i drink my bedside water 

and it tastes like a river.

when i open my eyes...

the smell of toast

and the sound of dad’s radio station

reach my bedroom;

it’s the home part of house. 

when i open my eyes...

i roll over and day dream

i have a thought...

today is the first today

there has never been one before.


rachel xx

a landscape of gentle privacy

looking through old note books i found some words...maybe it's a poem:

she lay on her bed and watched the shadows

everyone was sleeping and she listened to her gentle privacy

through the flyscreen she could smell the hour

she could hear the memory of music travelling across the paddocks

all tomorrow's lawn mowers were waiting for their owners

she let that big feeling of nothingness get inside her. 

i wrote this remembering the feeling of summer nights in suburbia when i was growing up. well, it wasn't quite suburbia. it was a strange kind of half developed estate with empty paddocks and lots of space. the dirt was red and it was a bit like living in no man's land in between the city and the western suburbs. i liked it. there was a train line that ran right behind my house. when i got on the train to go to the city at the deserted station i felt like i was coming in from mars. everyone looked at me as if to say 'you live here?'

i think this landscape has really stayed with me.

rachel xx